(STR)
Judge Mohammed Onabusha, a Guinean illegal alien who had spent precisely 5 minutes in America before President Joe Biden, who apparently mistook him for someone else, appointed him a federal judge, issued a ruling requiring that the Trump administration immediately restore to life the 11 Tren de Aragua drug smugglers who were on a drug smuggling vessel taken out by the US military.
Shortly after their boat blew up, the ACLU, Human Rights Watch and Planned Parenthood had filed for an immediate posthumous injunction on behalf of the drug smugglers, their families, mistresses and customers in Wayne County under 27 U.S.C. §205, 207, complaining about a lack of due process, tortious interference and disparate impact on protected wetlands in Venezuela.
Through a translator, Judge Onabusha, in a ruling containing numerous imaginary citations of previous precedents and federal laws invented by a hallucinating ChatGPT, lambasted the Trump administration’s violations of the human rights of the drug smugglers, barred any further military action against the drug cartels and demanded that Trump immediately restore the deceased drug smugglers to life accompanied by $1 billion in fines daily payable to the Tren de Aragua Society for Deceased Mules c/o Necklaces Inc.
Legal experts from Substack immediately celebrated the judge’s ruling and cited it as evidence that Trump is a lawless dictator who is probably already dead and needs to be immediately removed by a military coup conducted by fired DEI experts from the Pentagon.
While the Supreme Court did overrule Judge Onabusha in an unsigned ruling containing only one word “Seriously?”, Amazon ‘Rings of Power’ star Robert Reich took to CNN to denounce the justices as puppets who must immediately be replaced by a more progressive class of puppets. He could not however answer how the dead drug smugglers ought to be brought back to life, but a new medical expert and his slightly humpbacked assistant have offered one option.
