“And so, right now, Mr. Trump, to answer your call for political honesty, I just want to say, you’re not gonna be president, all right? It’s been fun. It’s been great. … But come on, come on, buddy! All, let’s say, cow poopoo aside, there is zero chance we’ll be seeing you being sworn in on the Capitol steps with your hand on a giant golden Bible.”
That was late-night host Stephen Colbert back in 2016 or so, and he got a lot of guffaws from his elite and uber-knowledgeable audience. But that prediction of his — which, to be fair, was but one among many — didn’t age too well, did it?
First, the good news: Colbert, the inveterate Trump-hater and longtime host of “The Late Show” on CBS, has been canceled by the network.
Now the bad news: The cancellation isn’t effective immediately. Instead, he’ll be polluting the airwaves with his progressive politics until next May. But, hey, we’ve been ignoring this guy for a decade now, so what’s another nine months?
Ya just hate to see it. Especially when he and his 200 staffers are getting their butts kicked by around one million viewers nightly by Fox News’s Greg Gutfeld.
“I absolutely love that ‘Colbert’ got fired,” Truthed Donald Trump. “His talent was even less than his ratings. I hear Jimmy Kimmel is next. Has even less talent than Colbert! Greg Gutfeld is better than all of them combined, including the Moron on NBC who ruined the once great Tonight Show.”
Speaking of Trump, as the AP reports: “Thursday’s announcement followed Colbert’s [purely coincidental!] criticism on Monday of a settlement between Trump and Paramount Global, parent company of CBS, over a ‘60 Minutes’ story.”
Of course, it wasn’t just any “60 Minutes” story. No, it was the “60 Minutes” story in which they interfered with the 2024 election by deceptively editing Kamala Harris’s word-salad response to a question about Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu in order to make her appear sentient. It failed miserably, but that wasn’t the point. The point is that CBS News and “60 Minutes” were exposed as Leftmedia scum, and they decided on July 1 that it’d be best to cough up $16 million to Donald Trump.
Earlier this week, Colbert expressed his indignation, calling the settlement “a big fat bribe” and adding, “I don’t know if anything — anything — will repair my trust in this company,” Colbert said. “But, just taking a stab at it, I’d say $16 million would help.”
Har-de-har-har. His network check-signers, though, weren’t amused. But this had been coming. It had to have been coming. Colbert, after all, just isn’t funny. I mean, how can you be funny if your idea of a lead guest is a lying partisan hack like Adam Freaking Schiff?
“Next year,” Colbert told his audience last night, “will be our last season. The network will be ending ‘The Late Show’ in May, and…” Howls of disapproval then rose up from his fellow elites, his fellow Trump-haters. “Yeah, I share your feelings,” Colbert gamely continued. “It’s not just the end of our show, but it’s the end of ‘The Late Show’ on CBS. I’m not being replaced. This is all just going away.”
No, you’re not dreaming. It’s sayonara to Stevie, the Shame of South Carolina. See for yourself:
So long Colbert
🪈
— Politi_Rican
𝕏
(@TheRicanMemes) July 18, 2025
Colbert, though, wasn’t just some smarmy, harmless, unfunny schlub. He was also a tool, a Big Brotherly tool. Back in the summer of 2020, as content creator Maze reminds us, Colbert produced a sneering skit that warned us about vaccines and Big Pharma. “Eleven months later,” Maze notes, “Colbert was dancing for the vaccine.”
Speaking of Colbert’s shameless shilling for the experimental stick, it was around that same time, summer of 2021, when his show jumped the shark. Colbert was still clinging to the deeply discredited notion that the COVID-19 virus came to us innocently from a bat or a pangolin, rather than incompetently or even malevolently from a Wuhan-based level 4 Chinese virology lab with a documented history of safety violations. And it was then that his former comedic colleague, Jon Stewart, undressed Colbert before a national audience of dozens.
“There’s been an outbreak of chocolatey goodness near Hershey, Pennsylvania,” Stewart famously reasoned. “What do you think happened? I don’t know, maybe a steam shovel mated with a cocoa bean. Or, it’s the f***ing chocolate factory!”
Colbert’s peeps aren’t taking this news lying down, though. Indeed, his staff is revolting. (You’re telling me!)
Nor are the Democrats taking the news in stride. The aforementioned Senator Schiff and his colleague, Honest Injun Elizabeth Warren, want answers. And they want ‘em now.
In the meantime, though, we can just enjoy some good news on a Friday.
