Despite being a group of people eager to portray the government shutdown as Republicans’ fault, the late night comedians used their Monday shows to attack Senate Democrats for finally realizing they had no leverage and ending the shutdown.
On CBS, The Late Show host Stephen Colbert mourned, “So yes, the shutdown may have been long and painful for millions of Americans, but at least it achieved jack squat.”
Colbert also decried that “None of those eight Senate Democrats are up for reelection next year, and two have announced they are retiring from the Senate. What a disappointing way to end your career. Reminds me of when Journey released their last single: ‘We Stopped Believin’.”
One Democrat Colbert singled out, “who crumbled like a granola bar in your backpack is New Hampshire Senator and The Joker’s proud aunt, Jeanne Shaheen. Shaheen was asked about her decision, and she said, ‘When I talk to my constituents in New Hampshire, you know what they say to me? … They say, ‘Why can’t you all just work together to address the problems that are facing this country?’ because the country is being run by insane people!”
Over on ABC, Jimmy Kimmel claimed, “Democrats refused to sign on to a bill that would force millions of Americans off of their health care and make it much more expensive for those who can afford it. So, Democrats drew a line in the sand. They said we are not going over this. And today, after 41 days, they pulled out a shovel and a bucket and they ate all that sand. And got nothing for it. Isn’t that great? You know what they got? They got a promise from the Republicans in the Senate to hold a vote on health care sometime in the future.”
Turning his ire to Minority Leader Chuck Schumer, Kimmel huffed, “I mean, at his age, it’s incredible at his age that Chuck Schumer is still able to bend over so far. Chuck Schumer is basically every parent who tells their kid “No more iPad. That’s it.” The next thing you know, he’s playing Roblox at the dinner table. This was such a big cave, by the Democrats, Bruce Wayne offered to buy it.”
Also on Kimmel’s bad side was Illinois’s Dick Durbin, who “told Senate Majority Leader John Thune that he was, ‘Counting on him to keep his word on this agreement. He assured me he would.’ Which is exactly what Lucy said to Charlie Brown with the football.”
On Comedy Central’s The Daily Show, Jon Stewart raged, “I cannot [bleep] believe it! You had the wind at your back! Election victories all over the country… Democrats, you sold out the entire shutdown not to get what you wanted, but for a promise to not get what you wanted later. Where in The Art of War—where—hold on—where in The Art of—okay, here it is: I got it. Sun Tzu said, ‘Never press your advantage. It’s unseemly! Fighting’s hard. How ’bout a snack?’”
Stewart also attacked the deal, “I can’t [bleep] believe it. And by the way, what good does a promise of a Senate vote even do for you? Democrats, you don’t control the Senate. Do you even know how this shit works?”
Later, Stewart welcomed Reps. Chris Deluzio and Pat Ryan and lamented, “The theory of their case, as far as I can tell is, people like you will lose if you stand your ground on principle. That you have to be the so-called moderate centrist that is going to reach across the aisle. Not realizing they didn’t reach across the aisle. They surrendered across the aisle.”
Deluzio concurred, claiming his constituents, “want us to fight for and we have been and to see what happened on the other side in the Senate is just — it is weak.”
Ryan echoed the sentiment, “People want to know, are you going to actually fight for me when it matters or are you going to cave? And that is the thing that matters, especially in this moment, but the folks that have been in the bubble in D.C. for longer than some of us have been around, they don’t—”
Stewart interrupted to agree, “Longer than even I’ve been around. I’ll be honest with you, I could go down there and kick their asses physically. Many of them are hollow like birds.”
Finally, on NBC’s Late Night, Seth Meyers despaired, “Democrats, are you seeing this? Why are you caving to this guy? In a span of, like, five days, he got crushed at elections, got booed at a football game, fell asleep in a meeting, and you guys saw that and thought, ‘There’s no way we can beat this guy. He’s at the top of his game.’”
After a clip of Sen. Angus King claiming the shutdown wasn’t achieving its goals, Meyers said the quiet part out loud, “What do you mean it didn’t work? Aren’t his poll numbers at an all-time low? Didn’t you just win a bunch of elections or did I hallucinate all of that?”
If you went a month without pay or had your flight cancelled, it’s okay because according to Seth Meyers Donald Trump’s poll numbers fell.
Here are transcripts for the November 10-taped shows:
CBS The Late Show with Stephen Colbert
11/10/2025
11:37 PM ET
STEPHEN COLBERT: So yes, the shutdown may have been long and painful for millions of Americans, but at least it achieved jack squat. That is—and we know why Jack is squatting. But these Democratic defectors did get one concession. Senate Majority Leader John Thune promised them a vote on the ACA in December. ‘Cuz that’s when people get serious at work: December.
You work about six days, and half of that is spent doing a mandatory office door decorating contest. “Welcome to accounting! Or should I say: The Polar Express!” “Now you got hot chocolate.”
No surprise, the vast majority of Democrats don’t want this. None of those eight Senate Democrats are up for reelection next year, and two have announced they are retiring from the Senate.
What a disappointing way to end your career. Reminds me of when Journey released their last single: “We Stopped Believin’.” Did they? I don’t know.
One of the Democrats who crumbled like a granola bar in your backpack is New Hampshire Senator and The Joker’s proud aunt, Jeanne Shaheen. Shaheen was asked about her decision, and she said, “When I talk to my constituents in New Hampshire, you know what they say to me?” “Uh, are we Vermont, or are we the other one? Are we, which one, one of us is—are they upside down us or upside down them” She continued, “They say, ‘why can’t you all just work together to address the problems that are facing this country?'” because the country is being run by insane people!
***
ABC Jimmy Kimmel Live!
11/11/2025
12:05 AM ET
JIMMY KIMMEL: Here in the present, we are on day 41 of the Trump government shutdown. Democrats refused to sign on to a bill that would force millions of Americans off of their health care and make it much more expensive for those who can afford it. So, Democrats drew a line in the sand. They said we are not going over this. And today, after 41 days, they pulled out a shovel and a bucket and they ate all that sand. And got nothing for it. Isn’t that great? You know what they got? They got a promise from the Republicans in the Senate to hold a vote on health care sometime in the future.
And if there is one thing we know about Trump and his merry band of sycophants it’s that their word is as good as gold. I mean, at his age, it’s incredible at his age that Chuck Schumer is still able to bend over so far. Chuck Schumer is basically every parent who tells their kid “No more iPad. That’s it.” The next thing you know, he’s playing Roblox at the dinner table. This was such a big cave, by the Democrats, Bruce Wayne offered to buy it.
Democrat Dick Durbin told Senate Majority Leader John Thune that he was, “Counting on him to keep his word on this agreement. He assured me he would.” Which is exactly what Lucy said to Charlie Brown with the football.
***
Comedy Central The Daily Show
11/10/2025
11:04 PM ET
JON STEWART: I cannot [bleep] believe it! You had the wind at your back! Election victories all over the country. The new Sydney Sweeney movie was box office: bupkis! Apparently, her new MAGA fan base didn’t show up in droves to see a biopic about a lesbian professional boxer who overcomes domestic violence to live her truth. Who could have seen that coming? Democrats, you sold out the entire shutdown not to get what you wanted, but for a promise to not get what you wanted later. Where in The Art of War—where—hold on—where in The Art of—okay, here it is: I got it. Sun Tzu said, “Never press your advantage. It’s unseemly! Fighting’s hard. How ’bout a snack?”
I can’t [bleep] believe it. And by the way, what good does a promise of a Senate vote even do for you? Democrats, you don’t control the Senate. Do you even know how this shit works? Let’s just say, for schincks, that you managed to win a vote in the Senate, which you haven’t done all year! You know what happens then? Hold on one second. Give me the thing, I want to show—
BILL ON CAPITOL HILL: I’m just a bill. Yes, I’m only a bill and I’m sitting here on Capitol Hill.
…
STEWART: The theory of their case, as far as I can tell is, people like you will lose if you stand your ground on principle. That you have to be the so-called moderate centrist that is going to reach across the aisle. Not realizing they didn’t reach across the aisle. They surrendered across the aisle.
CHRIS DELUZIO: I don’t know any constituents of ours that want us to just wilt. They want us to stand our ground for something that matters—
STEWART: Right.
DELUZIO: — and our health care of our region and yours. Like, peoples’ health care is a real thing that is bankrupting families. They’re going to roll the dice on buying, paying for a policy they may not be able to afford—
STEWART: Right.
DELUZIO: —or maybe showing up in the emergency room because they skipped out on health care.
STEWART: Right.
DELUZIO: That is something they want us to fight for and we have been and to see what happened on the other side in the Senate is just — it is weak.
PAT RYAN: I think, like, there is this old theory of left, right, progressive, centrist, moderate, it’s bullshit.
STEWART: Yeah.
RYAN: People want to know, are you going to actually fight for me—
STEWART: Right.
RYAN: —when it matters or are you going to cave? And that is the thing that matters, especially in this moment, but the folks that have been in the bubble in D.C. for longer than some of us have been around, they don’t—
STEWART: Longer than even I’ve been around. I’ll be honest with you, I could go down there and kick their asses physically. Many of them are hollow like birds.
***
NBC Late Night with Seth Meyers
11/11/2025
12:49 AM ET
SETH MEYERS: Democrats, are you seeing this? Why are you caving to this guy? In a span of, like, five days, he got crushed at elections, got booed at a football game, fell asleep in a meeting, and you guys saw that and thought, “There’s no way we can beat this guy. He’s at the top of his game.” I mean, I’m terrified of my wife, but once she falls asleep, I’m turning off her dumb movie and turning on the Knicks games.
But Democrats actually seem to think Trump had somehow won the shutdown fight.
ANGUS KING: We have to go back to what the strategy was at the beginning of the shutdown. There were two goals, both of which I support. One was standing up to Donald Trump. The other was getting some resolution on the ACA premium tax credit issue. The problem was the shutdown wasn’t accomplishing either goals [jump cut] so standing up to Donald Trump didn’t work.
MEYERS: What do you mean it didn’t work? Aren’t his poll numbers at an all-time low? Didn’t you just win a bunch of elections or did I hallucinate all of that?
